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Hometeam

by Steven Wagler

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1.
Be Here 03:31
Just wait til summer, come see me then, wild heat and hunger alive on our skin. Dance with the fire, sing for the trees, carried by the river, guided by the breeze. Be here with me. Just stay through autumn, let it slow ya down, summer sins all forgotten, beauty abounds. The warmth of your coffee, the chill in the air, as fleeting as it is haunting but don't despair just Be here with me. Just wait til summer, come see me then, as hopeless and lonesome as winter has been. I won't hold you to it, won't hold my breath, but I may draw the curtain now and again like Be here with me.
2.
I've got questions I ain't asking you, if you really want to know... but we both know that ya don't. What's the point of pressing it at all? Our suspicions, they ain't nothin new, if we could only let them go... or pay attention to their toll. What's the point of pressing you at all? Frayed love, don't rest your weight or we're falling to our death. Are you reaching for the scissors or the thread? I'm a mess. Do I hold onto you or my regret? I forget. Maybe we're just under the weather... Maybe all these strands will tangle together? Maybe it'll all go and get a bit better, ya never know. You know what they say, honey, don't look down. Do you best and try to block out the sound of everything we had as it hits the ground. We're calling out for help but nobody's around, I don't want to let ya go but it's wearing me out... [Chorus]
3.
Wet summer night, to the wind with all caution. Burn it alive, or hold it forever (on your mind) Neon light calls to the lost and I wander inside looking for better one more time... But I want nothing. Take me out, take me out. Break me in, break me out tonight. Show me something. Take me out, take me out. Let me up, let me down, or let me Go - to start over again. Go - to catch up with my friends. Go - to find one who won't let go. Young skin and bone, restless and lonesome, by moonlight roam. Blood in the water (hunger grows) All alone in roomfuls of nameless amorist drones. Meat on a wire (bought and sold) [Pre-Chorus] [Chorus] (Take me out, take me...) Modernized love. Sleek, streamlined love. Corporatized love. Synthesized love. Tell me I'm all that you ever wanted. I'll swear I've never been so haunted. "There's something here, there's something more..." "I've never been this far before..." [Chorus]
4.
I don't know what you did. And it's not that I forget I might just hate you for who you are. With every word you say... every time I see your face I pray one of us is torn apart. It's how you bit your nails, how you suck your teeth, way too much cologne, always standing way too close to me It's how you interrupt, invite yourself to stuff, and repeat those goddamn boring stories... I could hurt you, but I pity you too much. Were you like this as a kid? It would explain the lack of friends but how the hell can't you see it now? Just listen to yourself, and then anybody else. A shred of awareness might help you out. It's how you try too hard, how you're way too loud, always showing off the minute that you're in a crowd. You brag about finances and dozens of romances, and your shirt's too goddamn tight. [Chorus] It's how you make it weird, how you bitch and moan, ya think it makes you different but it just makes us uncomfortable. Counter-culture name drop, on about your time abroad, if you say empath one. more. time. [Chorus]
5.
I'm in a loop, every week it rests... "Hello, good morning, how was your weekend?" I kinda love it in that Stockholm sense, somebody kill me or sign the fucking check. Surely nobody would sit through this story, Wednesday's eternal but we go out to eat after work. After work, then we drink, then we sleep, then it's work, then it's work til it hurts. Hello, how are you? Aw, you don't look so Well we just have to get together Sooner or later this weather's got to Give me a call sometime, we don't talk enough. It's Friday night and we've got big, big plans. Dress up, stay up, catch up with our friends. I kinda hate it sometimes, it depends. Saturday mornings feeling like day old shit. Surely nobody would sit through this story, Sunday's alright but I'm already uptight over work. Yeah it's work, brush your teeth, go to sleep, then it's work, then it's work, til it hurts... [Chorus] Surely nobody would sit through this story, skip the funeral and lower me in the dirt, or the trash, or the lake, or the street, off a cliff, just so long as it works... [Chorus]
6.
My honey baby, she pulls me tight says she's got the hunger but she can't decide. Maybe some Italian? A 10-inch supreme? Let's go south of the border baby and add a little heat. I could tell right then and there, she's lost control, she's gotta have it all... She try a little curry, she can spice the meat. She'll go french in a hurry now, if she can dip the beef. This buffet's open and it's all for sale, I recommend the T-bone, raw as hell. I could tell right then and there, she's lost control, she's gotta have it all... Tell me what you want! She want Chinese, well I can walk the wok. She want the Angus beef now baby, I'll shake ya all night long. This buffet's open and it's you can eat. I know you're thirsty baby, I got what you need. I could tell right then and there, she's lost control, she's gotta have it all... Tell me what you want! I'll serve you coffee, I'll make you tea babe, All I want is for you just to come home with me. I said now, lord, I just can't get out the door, cause there's a man down there, might be your man I don't know.
7.
Randy's eyes were floatin when they landed on her, tried a line but his tongue got all tied up. She laughed in his face but shit if it didn't work, they danced the rest of the night up. Then 3 months later she's crying on the phone about a baby and her dad and a gun.. He said don't worry honey, I won't leave you alone, it ain't in my blood to run. Got fitted, got ready, for a future, for a wedding... Held in Kentucky. He'd never been all that lucky. No ace in the hole, no string on the pole, just another lost soul to Kentucky. Randy used to kick up some hell way back, but he swore those days were behind him. But every now and then Johnny and Jack would help the Devil remind him. The engine roaring, the pedal on the floor, leading the sheriff and a mile of dust. Then end over end, in the old cuffs again, and a phone call to wake her up. It's county, it's lockup, it's Randy, he's fucked up and Held in Kentucky. He'd never been all that lucky. No ace in the hole, no chance of parole, just another lost soul to Kentucky. Randy settled down as the years stacked up, had some kids that had some kids of their own. Late one night when the time felt right he let the good lord take him home. Got fitted, got suitable, for the farewell, for the funeral... Held in Kentucky. He'd never been all that lucky. No ace in the hole, no bones left to roll, just another lost soul to Kentucky. No ace in the hole, no fork in the road, just another lost soul to Kentucky.
8.
We were growing up, you were out in front, leaving prints to help me find the way. Always first, never afraid. Bloody cotton, double knotted, I was shakin, 'shittin razorblades' Always first never afraid. It was come what may every goddamn day. I can't remember a day from that summer, no, but the feeling remains. We were swimming in the river, smoking broken cigarettes, with the sun on our face we were Halfway from everything and nothing at all we were Halfway from everywhere and nowhere at all we were Halfway. Days stretched like shadows in the sun, the more we ran em down the longer they'd run. Night stood frozen beneath that golden streetlight, all that promise unbroken. Give me that trust, give me that faith, you can't, you can't, it's gone. Give me that hope, give me that strength, but you can't... [Chorus] I get it, we can't get it back, it's gone. [Chorus]
9.
Unearthly siren, harbinger your pale horse tore through our city and brought us to our knees. Dull dysphoria, in lieu of golden eagles leave me hopeless where all our roads now lead and cease to be... Gold-petaled flowers fell apart around us. Sunburned shadows where we used to be. Our love, too fragile, boiled into vapor, Gone forever, somewhere far away. Our God of violence, tumbling from the heavens, which fated building will wake you from your sleep? Cull me Reaper, in lieu of fallen angels, soft and painless but not before I see her spread her wings...
10.
Close your eyes, let the freeway sing ya to sleep. 1,000 miles felt so far away... now, behind us. Pink sunrise, we're still wide awake, sing me something. No goodnights for young runaways... sing me anything. Your feet up on the dash, your hair blown crazy. Soon we'll be headed back, but what if, maybe.... when the time is passed we just keep going? Could we just keep going? You tell these stories in photographs, I tell you stories to hear you laugh. Will you write my story, my epitaph? "Just one more story, one more photograph." [Chorus]
11.
I guess I'm overdo. I've been pacing this same ground now for too long... wore a rut into the stone that I laid over you. All this time, thought I was moving forward, I was wrong. Am I even in control? Deep breath. Calm down. No more drinking alone at home. Deep breath. Slow count. Where's that pressure coming from? Deep breath. Chill out. All this fear of the unknown... exhale, let go. Does time reveal, or remove? Have I been hollowed or was nothing in there all along? I'd have trembled at the thought but here I am unmoved, and then brought to tears by the sound of some old tired song that made me happy when I was young. Deep breath. Calm down. Fall asleep without getting stoned. Deep breath. Slow count. Where's that pressure coming from? Deep breath. Chill out. All this fear of the unknown... exhale, let go. You're standing on the bank of a river. Are you looking at the water or yourself looking back? You're standing on the bank of a powerful river, knowing one step forward and there's no coming back. You're standing at the bank of a terrifying river, and to know where it's headed, you can never come back. yeah to know where it's headed, you can never come back. Deep breath. Calm down. Remember, ya don't have to go alone. Deep breath. Slow count. Where's that pressure coming from? Deep breath. Chill out. All this fear of the unknown... exhale, let go.

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released May 12, 2020

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Steven Wagler Albuquerque, New Mexico

Midwesterner that grew up in punk and cover bands just writing and recording when time and opportunity allow.

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